It Starts and Ends with Ice

Think you're invincible? Bet I can show you a prison full of individuals who likely thought the same thing. However, they'll hear the metal bars slam behind them tonight when they turn out the lights and they won't feel untouchable when the moaning sounds of prison consume them while they drift off to sleep. Chances are if their delusional dreams don't wake them up tonight, someone else's nightmares will. This is where crystal meth leads you. Welcome home.

In years past, teens tried pot or coke, possibly popped a few pills and probably had sex before marriage. They lied about where they were going, hid their boyfriend in their closet and drank alcohol right under an unsuspecting parent's nose. You're probably thinking, child's play aren't you? You're right, compared to the methamphetamine abusers, drug users of yesterday belong on the jungle gym. Even if they became addicted to alcohol or pills, their addiction was a walk in the park compared to meth addiction.

Let me tell you, you aren't so tough just because you are choosing to play with fire. In fact, let me scare you to death, you will get burned, no scorched, if you step close enough to the fumes of the fire. You won't be given the chance to back away, one step is all it takes and if you are lucky enough to have a friend on meth, then the flames will encircle you quickly. You'll never know you're on the road to hell until you get to the end of it and then, that's where the fun begins.

You'll drive yourself insane trying to sort things out in your mind, you'll experience paranoia like never before, you'll curse your mother, steal from your siblings, and you'll call little children names they've never heard before. You'll have scabs on your face, in between your fingers, you'll sweat profusely and become consumed with where you can find your next fix. And this will be your life on a good day.

On bad days, you'll be chased by the devil, you'll take down your home's walls, crash in your television sets, strip down your bed, take apart your refrigerator and you still won't find the voices. You'll take out your dashboard in your vehicle, call up a relative and threaten to kill them if they don't stop the voices and if you're lucky, the demons you hear will nap for awhile allowing you to doze off to sleep.

When they awake, you'll be up within minutes and the whole process will start again. You'll hear your mother, you'll see your sister, you'll talk to your dad and then realize no one is there so you will call everyone up at 3 AM and ask them why they left without saying good-bye all the while cursing them. You will steal from your own grandfather and then, when that's not good enough, you'll steal from your baby sister or her children. You don't care, you just want to get high. Correction, you need to get high.

What started as fun at a party now forces you to realize, really realize, you were entering into a life you would never be able to depart. Your mother or father won't be able to save you and your sisters and brothers will be helpless. You'll be angry at them and want to inflict pain on them, emotional or physical, it makes no difference to you and you will take your family down with you because you can and because you'll refuse to let them find peace without you. Some of your family members will eventually come to the conclusion you would be better off dead and then they will hate themselves because of it. You will systematically destroy each member of your family because you'll make sure they can not escape you or your problem.

One day, your family will not recognize you at all. Some of your family members will never give up hope, others will despise you for eternity because of the happy years you take away from your family and you will not only take those years, you'll destroy them. Misery loves company and meth loves misery. You will create a circle of unhappiness for yourself and your family.

If you're rich, you'll be poor. If you're poor, you'll be lower than a snake's belly because wherever you are in your life, once you try methamphetamines, your life as you know it will be over and it is then down hill until you hit rock bottom. However, rock bottom for meth addicts usually promises one of two things. Prison or the cemetery and both places are ice cold. Irony, sweet irony delivers to you exactly what you deserve, what you wanted and perhaps even asked for by name. However, your family did not.

They didn't ask to remove all children from the home in the middle of the night because you threatened to kill someone in the home. They didn't stand by your side and ask you to try meth. They didn't make the decision to give up their family, their friends and their life. You made the decision. However, when you made the decision, you made a decision for everyone who loves and cares for you in your life. Often, you made the conscious decision to ruin the lives of everyone who loves you and that may be one of the cruelest aspects of the crystal meth addiction.

Mothers are leaving their children without a second thought. More and more children are raised by their grandparents because their parents are more in love with a fix than with the idea of parenthood. Parents are losing their children and families are split. Welcome to the world of meth. Enjoy your ride. It will be one of the best rollercoaster rides you will experience, but only for a very limited time, and then my friend, meth will walk you through a very wicked Haunted Forest and you'll be lucky if you ever leave alive.

<< back

 
Having Lived... enables you to write
home | bio | services | family | purchase | links | contact
[ web design | www.barbaracarneiro.com ]